Friday, February 24, 2012

Ice Queen



In a perfect Texas twang, the voice on the other end of the line instructs me, “Now just hold on a minute.  A truck is drivin’ by and I can’t hear ye.”

I wait and then continue to tell the salesman that the ice maker I want from him makes the clear, square kind of cubes. 

“Y’ all don’t like the cresent-shaped ones?  I’ve got one of those.”

He then tells me to hold again.

“Another truck?”

“No, are you old enough to know who Marlon Brando is?”

“Sure, yeah.”

“Well, I am watchin’ “Mutiny on the Bounty” and my favorite part is comin’ up.”

“Oh, really?”  I try to be nice.  I want my ice maker before summer.

“Here it is.  The part when the captain slaps the first mate.”

I’ve been exchanging phone calls with Alan from Texas for a few months.  I need a special custom ice maker to replace the broken one we have.  It’s a fussy, special size, costs-an-arm and-a-leg number, but I found this broker who you can get a factory second from for less than half retail.  We already have a door panel that matches our other appliances, so it doesn’t matter if there is cosmetic damage.  I am sure he already thinks I am a fruity and nutty Californian who is willing to pay extra time and money for square, clear ice, so I guess I can steer my thoughts about this factory seconds salesman slash Marlon Brandon fan in another direction.

“Tell me about it, Alan.”

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